Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
