did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
