I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
