if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
