I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
