when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
