The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize