This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
