i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
