so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
