Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
