When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
