your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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