idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
