Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
