the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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