HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
