I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
