Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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