and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
