There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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