dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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