That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
