we were pretty classy up until the second keg
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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