It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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