Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Randomize
