wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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