is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
