im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Randomize
