dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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