That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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