If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
