I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I accidentally burped into my bong.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Randomize
