Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
