She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
