Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize