I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
organizing the empties. That sober.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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