Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
