so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
