please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
