I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
