So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize