What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
i out mim tonsoeep
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