Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
