Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
