seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
