Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
