so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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