ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
P.S. I can't hear my feet
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
