Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
